Why VCs Ghost Founders & How to Build Better Investor Relationships

Table of Contents

• Introduction
• Why VCs Ghost Founders
• Major Relationship Killers for VCs
• Building Stronger VC Relationships
• When Rejection Occurs
• The Long Game of VC Relationships
• Conclusion
• More Venture Capital Insights for Founders

Introduction

Raising capital is like dating. You research potential matches, prepare for first meetings, and hope for that spark of connection. But the venture capital world has its own unwritten rules and etiquette expectations. And similar to relationships, getting ghosted hurts.

Whether you're pitching your startup to VCs for the first time or managing ongoing investor relationships, how you manage these connections can make or break your fundraising efforts. This isn't just about securing capital—it's about building a lasting network of supporters who believe in you and your vision.

In this guide, we'll explore the relationship between founders and investors, why VCs sometimes disappear, and how to build relationships that endure through the startup journey's challenges with proper etiquette and communication.

Why VCs Ghost Founders

Getting ghosted after what felt like a promising pitch meeting can leave you questioning everything. "Did they hate my product? Was it something I said?" While the silence is frustrating, understanding why it happens can help you take it less personally.

In a recent TechCrunch article examining why VCs ghost founders, several prominent investors shared insights about their communication practices with entrepreneurs. Their responses reveal patterns that every founder should understand.

The Time Crunch Reality

According to Mercedes Bent, partner at Lightspeed Venture Partners, time is every VC's most limited resource. The venture capital landscape has expanded dramatically in recent years, with more firms, more capital, and exponentially more pitches to evaluate.

The math is simple: a typical VC receives 30+ inbound pitches daily. If they spent 15 minutes responding to each one, that's 7.5 hours—their entire workday—just writing responses.

Eric Bahn of Hustle Fund acknowledges the volume challenge that many investors face, making it increasingly difficult to provide personalized responses to every founder outreach.

This volume creates a tension: VCs prioritize spending time on exciting opportunities, while deprioritizing detailed rejections that won't "convert" to investments.

The Rapid Development of VC

The investing environment has shifted dramatically over the past decade. VCs now make decisions faster than ever, leaving little room for the personal touch that once characterized the industry.

In this churn-and-burn culture, relationships feel transactional. Mercedes Bent observes that "VC has ballooned at a breakneck speed—more firms, more capital, more pitches. With more focus on volume and speed, there's little room for the intentionality and personal touch that once defined the industry."

What are Ghosting Signals?

Ghosting signals a lack of interest. If a VC wanted to invest, they'd respond to your cold call or get back to you after the pitch. When a VC seems too busy to respond, it's not because they're uncertain—they've already decided to pass.

An investor told Techcrunch, "Things most often slip through the cracks when I'm super swamped. This is never about the founder and always about what else I have going on in life."

Major Relationship Killers for VCs

Just as there are warning signs in dating that make someone run, certain founder behaviors will cause VCs to pull away immediately—sometimes permanently. Understanding these deal-killers can help you avoid them.

Dishonesty and Misrepresentation

In the TechCrunch investigation, every VC interviewed for the article cited dishonesty as a deal-killer. This includes exaggerations, lack of transparency, and outright lies about metrics, team capabilities, market size, or technology performance.

Sheel Mohnot of Better Tomorrow Ventures shared how he caught a founder lying about a deal with another startup that happened to be in his portfolio: "A quick text message sorted that one out.”

Lack of Self-Awareness

Eric Bahn is particularly turned off by founders who claim their startup has no competitors or faces no existential risks. When he asks founders what could kill their businesses, he's shocked by how many respond: "Nothing.”

"Anyone with simple self-awareness knows that absolutely is not true," says Bahn. "So many things can threaten their business: competitors outperforming, markets facing new compliance or regulation, a new pandemic.”

As a potential investor, VCs want to know you see the risks but have plans to mitigate them. Bahn quotes Andy Grove: "Only the paranoid survive.”

Unprofessional Behavior When Receiving Feedback

How you handle rejection reveals your character. Some founders respond to detailed feedback with anger, name-calling, or even threats. Bahn notes this occurs more frequently to his female colleagues than to him.

"I'm grateful when those moments happen because it means we made the right choice to not choose to work with that founder," Bahn says. The consequences go beyond a single missed opportunity:

The Founder's Ego Trip

As noted in our blog post 'The Danger of Hubris,' securing significant funding—while just a milestone, not actual business success—can act like a powerful drug. It changes people, often so gradually that it's hardly noticeable at first.

Signs of dangerous founder hubris include:

1. Financial extravagance - Prioritizing image over sustainability with premium office space, unnecessary team perks, or promotional events with unclear ROI.
2. Unfocused expansion - Adding headcount rapidly across multiple locations without the strategic foundation or market validation to support such growth.
3. Sidelining early supporters - Becoming less accessible to the initial investors and advisors who provided critical support when the company was just an idea.
4. Metrics manipulation - Using new funding rounds to obscure troubling business fundamentals rather than addressing core economic challenges.

AI-Generated Outreach

In an ironic twist, one investor cited frustration with AI-generated founder cold outreach. He said, "It's so much that it's drowning out all the genuine outreach. I can tell it's AI-generated because I get dozens with the same structure, but different words, and there are always some weird inaccuracies."

Many VCs may love to back AI startups, but many don't want to be on the receiving end of generic AI-generated emails. The investor warned, "Eventually, we will just filter out any email from an unknown sender because it's likely an AI-generated message."

Building Stronger VC Relationships

Now that we understand what kills relationships with VCs, let's explore how to build stronger, lasting connections.

Communicate Like a Human, Not a Sales Robot

Before the Meeting:

• Do your homework on the VC. Look at what companies they've backed, what they care about, and their recent investments.
• Make sure your pitch deck is up-to-date. Experienced investors immediately notice outdated presentation dates.
• Try to get introduced by a mutual connection, as cold emails have lower success rates

During the Meeting:

• Be yourself. VCs invest in people they can imagine working with for years.
• Strike a balance between confidence in your vision and openness to feedback.
• Show you've studied your competition and understand the market.
• Honestly address potential challenges and explain your plans to address them.

After the Meeting:

• Send a short, genuine thank you note.
• Clear up any questions you couldn't completely answer during your conversation.
• Be specific about next steps and timing.

Follow Up Without Being Annoying

There's a fine line between persistence and pestering. Here's how to stay on the appropriate side:

1. Wait an appropriate time - Give them at least a week before following up.
2. Be concise - Keep follow-up emails brief and to the point.
3. Add value - Share important updates (new customers, product milestones, etc.)
4. Know when to move on - After 2-3 unanswered follow-ups, shift your attention elsewhere.

Demonstrate Skill and Awareness

VCs want to support founders who:

1. Know their numbers thoroughly - Not just the highlights but the underlying metrics driving your business.
2. Understand unit economics - Can explain how the business generates revenue at scale.
3. Have a realistic growth strategy - Not just "we'll go viral" but concrete acquisition channels and costs.
4. Acknowledge reasonable risks - And have mitigation strategies.

Be Memorable (For the Right Reasons)

How do you stand out in a sea of pitches? Not with gimmicks, but with substance:

1. Tell a personal story - Why you? Why this problem? Why now?
2. Show, don't just tell - Demos are powerful, especially of working products with actual users. If you need a quick prototype, consider using Replit where you can create a prototype in minutes for just a few dollars.
3. Articulate unique insights - What do you understand that others don't?
4. Be intellectually honest - Acknowledge limitations and challenges.

When Rejection Occurs

Even the best founders face rejection. How you handle it can determine whether a "no" today might become a "yes" later.

Respond Gracefully to "No"

When a VC declines to invest:

1. Thank them for their time - Regardless of the outcome, they provided you with something valuable.
2. Stay professional - Never respond emotionally or defensively.
3. Leave the door open - "I respect your decision and would welcome reconnecting if circumstances change."

Extract Value from Feedback

Not all investors provide detailed feedback, but when they do:

1. Listen without defensiveness - Their perspective offers valuable market insights.
2. Ask clarifying questions - "What metrics would make this investment more attractive?"
3. Consider the source - Feedback from VCs in your space is more significant.

Keep Future Opportunities

Your company and investor interest will change:

1. Send occasional updates - Brief quarterly emails to inform investors who showed interest but ultimately passed on your previous round.
2. Share significant milestones - Major product launches, key hires, or impressive growth metrics.
3. Reconnect when appropriate - When raising your next round or if their concerns are resolved.

It's Not Personal

Rejection happens for many reasons beyond your control:

1. Portfolio fit - They might already have a similar company.
2. Fund timing - They might be at the end of their fund with limited capital remaining, as detailed in our article about how VC firms manage their funds.
3. Market focus shifts - Their investment thesis may have evolved.
4. Partner dynamics - Internal disagreements among partners often jeopardize deals.

The Long Game of VC Relationships

Venture capital is a marathon, not a sprint. Taking the long view on relationships pays dividends.

Why Relationship Building Matters Beyond the Current Fundraise

Today's "no" can become tomorrow's "yes" if you:

1. Stay on their radar - Maintain relevant, value-adding touchpoints.
2. Show progress - Demonstrate you're executing the plan you presented.
3. Build social capital - Help them with introductions or insights when needed.

How Word Travels in VC Circles

The venture community is small and closely linked:

1. VCs talk - They regularly share notes on founders and companies.
2. Reputation follows you - How you treat one investor affects how others view you.
3. Back-channel references - Investors almost always check with mutual connections, a practice explained in our article about how VCs spend their time.

Building a Reputation as a Founder

The best founder reputations are built on:

1. Integrity - Absolute honesty, even when it's uncomfortable
2. Execution - Consistent delivery on promises
3. Adaptability - Thoughtful course corrections based on market feedback
4. Communication - Transparent updates in good times and bad
5. Resourcefulness - Making impressive progress with limited resources

Conclusion

Proper venture capitalist etiquette ultimately comes down to fundamental respect and professionalism.

VCs are people, not ATMs. They have limitations, preferences, and their own pressures. Founders who build strong, lasting investor relationships approach these connections with genuine human empathy and professional courtesy.

Fundraising success depends on many factors—some within your control and others not—but how you conduct yourself through the process is entirely your choice. Professional, authentic, and resilient founders may face rejection, but they rarely get permanently blacklisted.

In the venture capital world, every interaction builds your reputation. In the words of Mercedes Bent: "I'm not saying any of these are good reasons [for ghosting]. It's the reality. It's the game. Treat people how you want to be treated."

Entrepreneurs who succeed with investors aren't always the ones with the fanciest presentations or the most prestigious backgrounds. Instead, it's often the founders who pair a clear, exciting vision with basic people skills. They build real connections with investors—relationships strong enough to survive the ups and downs that every startup faces.

More Venture Capital Insights for Founders

New to VC terminology? Our venture capital glossary breaks down the industry jargon into plain language so you can enter investor meetings with confidence.

Preparing for your next fundraise? Understanding how financing rounds actually work can help you set realistic expectations and negotiate better terms.

Want to think like an investor? Our deep dive into how VCs make money reveals the incentives and constraints that drive investor behavior.